I love chick singers..from Billie Holiday to Joni Mitchell to Amy Grant..so I decided to share this Christmas day with Amy..she's a Christian but she's dirty, too..like an old scratchy 45 record coming from an old transistor AM radio! I like that..let me recite a Christmas poem for you with Amy singing in the background...twasnottwasthenightbefore
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
the whole goddamn family was drunk as a louse,
with mom in the whore house and dad in jail, I sat myself down to a cold glass of ale.
When out on the lawn, I heard such a clatter,I got off my sister to see what was the matter.
And what to my stoned-out eyes should appear,but a shitty old sleigh and eight fucking reindeer.
With a dirty old man who was beating his dick,I knew at that moment, it must be St. Nick.
He flew across the lawn and up the house wall,he cried onward you bastards or it's off with your balls.
Then down the chimney he came like a bat out of hell,I knew at that moment, the fat fucker fell.
He filled all the stockings with drugs and beer,and a big rubber dildo for my uncle who's queer. And up again he went with a great big fart,that son of a bitch blew my chimney apart.
And I heard him say as he flew out of sight,"piss on you all it's been a hell of a night."
and have yourselves a Weird Little Christmas!!
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