VATICAN CITY (July 15) -- The Vatican issued a new set of norms Thursday to respond to worldwide clerical abuse, cracking down on priests who rape and molest minors and the mentally disabled.The norms extend from 10 to 20 years the statute of limitations on priestly abuse and also codify for the first time that possessing or distributing child pornography is a canonical crime, ie, no big deal..But the document made no mention of the need for bishops to report abuse to police and doesn't include any "one-strike and you're out" policy as demanded by some victims' groups.rule #1: use vase
line so you don't hurt their little bums so much..rule #2: when listening to confession, wear a jock strap to contain your mild boner..
rule #3: when raping a mentally disabled youngster, blind fold them so they can't recognize you in church later
rule #4: little kids like candy, so give them lots of candy before you ask them to touch you there...
rule #5: there will be a limit of two choir boys per month for bishops
rule #6: teach teens to jer
k off to a picture of the Pope!rule #7: tell the kids that you were abused as a child, so it's ok for you to abuse them
rule #8: frenchkissing children is now acceptable!
rule #9: tell them it's okay, Jesus was gay!
rule #10: assure them that hickeys are cool!
there, that should facilitate more cooperation between the church and the flock....and a more intimate relationship with God...
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