Money for Nothin'...

I need to , I need to, I need to take a pee....

On my way to a Sunday hike, I stop at the post office to get my mail....I pull out a big envelope stuffed into my tiny PO box..it's a survey from the Nielson folks...I put the envelope on the front seat to read later and take off to the Bluffs for a hike, even though I need to pee...
It's a lovely warm spring type day, I even smiled at all the off leash doggies on the Bluffs! Cute little pooches I say to myself..I walk by one couple with a little white poodle..the little dog walked right in front of me and tried to trip me..like a cat does! I laughed and waved to the couple..no problem..they laughed and waved back. Definitely a glad town vibe today! but I really need to pee...
Nothing can spoil this day I thought, except if I pee in my pants..what if I just whip it out and go in the bushes like a dog, I could get arrested for indecent exposure, unlike a dog!
but my problems don't amount to a hill of refried beans in this crazy life..I'm a lucky guy! We're all lucky, aren't we, to some degree....the Bluffs are starting to sprout springtime flowers, butter cups and sourgrass..the hawks, crows and turkey vultures are soaring overhead and dive bombing each other, trying to get the upper hand..a few squabbles then they fly away realizing perhaps there's room for all of us in this vast space....which I could easily take a pee in.
I finish my hike and head back home and finally pee!!! I open my mail, the Nielson envelope, and therein lies five of the crispest, cleanest one dollar bills I've ever seen or touched..wow...cool..I filled out the survey post haste..if someone pays me to do a job, I do it.
Then I got to thinking, what if 500 people sent me 5 dollars..I'd get $2500 dollars... that's what! How about 1000 peeps...$5000!! You get my drift? I'm not soliciting funds or anything, it's just that, well, if Nielson can do it, why can't you? 5 little dollars..if you can't afford that then you are a cheapskate!
if you can....thanks in advance..and don't drink 3 cups of coffee before you go on a hike!